Perhaps all of this is coming out of the wood work at the same time time because for many February is still in the that bubbly start of the new year. For many that have been dating for the year or two years, or what ever your mark may be, then it may be a question that is in your near future.
Let's take a look at the few things that are involved:
1. Space planning
I had just graduate from the Art Institute of Chicago and I wasn't ready to return to the california. Unfortunate for my sake, my then boyfriend hadn't told his out-of-state parents when they made an unscheduled appearance the morning after I moved in. The kitchen had a palm tree and all of my clothes strung about on the table, chairs, and the stove. I had spent that night, lucky old me, in my old lofted-dorm apartment that looked down to Marshall Field's and was directly across from the wonderful Louis Sullivan facade on Carson Pirie Scott.
A side note to this story as it pop into my mind is that I where I lived was directly across from the Carson Pirie Scott bed department. I had ample time to watch young, new, and old couples kicking back on the model floor display. I also watched the single ladies and men roam in a more absent way through the same department. Of course, there were many times I realized that they were watching me back and I had to hit the deck and crawl to my bathrobe. But, that's another story.
I had borrowed my boyrfriend's apartment key when I walked in and saw his parents standing in the kitchen who knew better than that there son had started to wear pink undies. Yep, slightly embarassed. But, planning room in any situation can be strained and it has to be done.
Once his parents left, I realized that his Cost Plus Havana style couch was going to stay. And it being made of bamboo and a few too many years old made it an eye sore. I had told myself as a young girl that I would never cross that line of being unmarried and living with a guy. Yet, I also realized that my prince charming wasn't going to defeat an evil army to steal me away from my locked castle room nor did I think that I would marry Mr. Right as a virgin. Some childhood dreams crash and burn with age. Okay, what was I talking about? Oh yeah, if you move in with a guy, you are going to make some sacrifices.
2. Sort the Bills
I knew an old grumpy photographer in Chicago that had a partner. I had thought he was gay for like four months until I met his partner that was a women. They had been living together for over seven years which I believes means that the couple is automatically married (Common law marriage is the quiant term I think, I'm not going to look this one up because I want to take my bath). That's beside the point or maybe he was grumpy for other reasons. For instance, I learned that he had never bought his partner a meal. He had split the cost in half ever since they dated. Strange in my book? I love to buy people drinks and meals. I love it even more when I have my loved one buy me lattes and chocolate! I couldn't imagine the strain of a living realtionship being cut so severe;y down the middle. Couples have to set up their financial agreement before moving into the same place. This can led to disagreements or unhappiness and cause relationship strain until a settlement occurs. This is one of the least romantic moments in the whole process of moving in together. Later in my working relationship with this photographer, I had other friends that were close to him explain to me how taxing the whole arrangement was for him and his partner. I was told that he was always bitter about some portion of a bill that his partner hadn't paid. I think the other lesson is: Don't move in with a cheap-o.
3. Romance
Baby, we all want some afterglow! We're loving each other like we do in order to find a slice of peace and heaven under the oak tree. Oh and romance. I've dated relationship phobics (why? don't ask me? just too darn good looking to stay away!) who had constantly recited to me something along these lines: Take a jar and put a penny for each time the afterglow is in effect for the first year of marriage. As the saying goes, all the pennies in the jar at the end of the year will be the amount of loves sessions left for the entire marriage. I didn't date him for long. But, keeping the love motion exciting is a dilema. The only boy that I did live with ended up in complete afterglow melt-down.
OVERALL
A short conclusion. Don't do it. Okay. Maybe you wondering how such a level-headed blog entry got to this conclusion. Like I said, I have a bath to take & it just doesn't work. If you're considering to room alone or board with your boy, this brunette says keep your room. Virigina Woolf will side with me.
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